Yesterday was thanksgiving and as most people do, I got together with my family (brothers, sister in laws, and parents) for the day. Anytime occasions like this arise I always get a little tense and uncomfortable because my family knows what kind of hair I used to have and its impossible not to notice that 3/4 of it is gone. No one says anything but I can’t help but feel it is what they are thinking every time they see me. I no longer share my hair loss troubles with them or anyone else for that matter. Back when my hair loss first started years ago I did talk about it, but it seemed that they could never really understand or sympathize with me. I always ended up feeling worse after having any discussion about it so I just stopped talking about it altogether.
Anyways, I blow dried my hair in the morning and used some defrizzing gel and mousse for volume (ha yea right) to try and feel better about the whole thing. I finished by smoothing out all the fly away hairs with a flat iron. Honestly it didn’t look too bad, but it felt like feathers, actually less than feathers. I hate that more than anything… that I can’t feel my hair. I once told that to another person, and they looked at me like I was nuts, further fostering my notion that speaking to anyone about my hair loss was utterly pointless. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to make it through the day with my hair down, it was too distracting for me because I was constantly focused on it. I made it to my mother’s front door and then out came the clip, I clipped it up and there it stayed for the rest of Thanksgiving. As a matter of practicality I would have had to have clipped it up anyways because my hair sheds so easily, it would have definitely been an unwelcome ingredient in the stuffing. When I was very young I always hated how my hair looked pulled back, and I thought to myself thank goodness I have a lot of it to frame my face… now I am forced to wear it up all the time, really… how cruel can life be?
Even with all my hair worries I did enjoy Thanksgiving and spending time with my family. I was thankful for being alive, still having hair on my head, having a great family and having the ability to communicate with all of you about my hair loss life. I very much appreciate all the support you have given me and the support you have given to other women on this blog. It’s hard talking to just anyone about our hair loss, so it’s nice to write to women who truly understand. I hope you all had a really wonderful Thanksgiving!
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