Last week … for the very first time… I saw a women with male pattern baldness. Not just the diffuse all over loss that I am used to seeing, but completely bald on top with hair on the side and in the back (just like those Propecia commericals on You Tube). The lady was probably in her late 60s with gray hair. The surprising thing for me was that the hair she had on the sides and back was still quite thick! I was impressed by the fact that she was out in public without a wig or hair covering of any type. This wasn’t a woman who doesn’t care about her appearance because she had taken the time to put on her makeup and dress nicely.She passed by me so quickly that I only had time to register her hair loss and glance at her face before she was gone. After she was out of my line of vision I actually found myself wondering if she could possibly be a cross dresser or transsexual. My mind simply could not wrap itself around the idea that a woman could really have that type of hair loss.I know that this lady was not in my line of vision long enough that looking at her could have been considered staring, but I know that if she had not walked away from me that I would have definitely tried to get a closer look. I like to think that I would have found something kind to say or some way to pay her a compliment.
I sometimes wish that I had little WomensHairLossProject business cards to hand to women I meet… but then I have to remind myself that many of these women might still be in a place that having someone notice their loss may be insulting. I feel as if this website has made me more open and accepting of my own hair loss. I think I should remind myself more frequently that not everyone is ready to discuss this condition openly with people they have never met ;o)
About the author: Dottie is a community member of the Women’s Hair loss Project. To learn more about her and read her other blog posts, visit her profile: http://community.womenshairlossproject.com/Dottie/
Here is one of those propecia commercials Dottie was making reference to.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Like I have said before……. You are a talented and caring woman, this writing touched my heart in a very special way, Thank you! LOVE ROBIN
Hi Dottie:
Yes this defiantely touched my heart as well. Even though I am kind of in the angry stage I still want to talk to people (that are going through it) about it. I take the train into work every day in Boston and after this started for myself I noticed more and more how common this is. There have been times that I have wanted to approached women and ask how they deal with it and if they have an advice but don’t because I don’t want to insult them either.
Lisa
Robin & Lisa,
Thank you for your kind words. My heart truly went out to this woman, and I have to admit that there was also a touch of fear in my heart that someday this is what my hair might look like. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was some outward sign (button, pin, ribbon, etc.) that we could use to show the world that it’s ok to approach us? I wonder how many times other women with hair loss have wanted to approach me and ask questions, but were to afraid they might insult me? Hhhmmmm… makes the mind wonder.
I truly believe that alot of women suffer with this and I really see it more and more. Thank God for this site and all the wonderful women I have met!
Having watched my mother quickly advance through the stages of hair loss, I was devastated when the same thing happened to me. Naively, maybe even selfishly, I had never taken the time to look into the causes of female hair loss and so it had never entered my mind that this would be passed to me. Now it’s become my ‘world’, I constantly glance at other women, and find myself envying those with a gloriously thick head of hair and intrigued, concerned and companionate towards those living with hair loss. I too feel the need to talk to other suffers, I want to gain an insight into their strategies for coping. Are they putting on a brave front, or is every step a painful battle? I think I’m slowly coming to terms with the fact that this is happening to me, but I need to have a plan of action to focus on.
I have male pattern … and its awful… nobody can really explain why.. and it feels really unfair..especially cuz im not a male!